


Michael Rides B*tch?

by 1987lostboy



Category: Lost Boys (Movies)
Genre: 80s, 80s slang, Bad Flirting, Brother dynamics, Cliche, Dark Comedy, Dark fluff, Dracula the play, Dwayne Died, Edgy David, Fluff, Grandpa is iconic, Human Michael, Implied Marko/Paul, Implied Sam/The Frogs, Jock Michael, M/M, Motorbike Love, No Homophobia, Paul being a good brother, Play Fighting, Swearing, Twilight Bashing, Twilight References, Unconventional Families, Unconventional Relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2020-01-01 05:55:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,520
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18329972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/1987lostboy/pseuds/1987lostboy
Summary: There's no way Michael's riding bitch.Not even for David.Okay maybe just for David.





	Michael Rides B*tch?

“No fuckin’ way David”

Michael’s boyfriend leant against his bike raising his eyebrow languidly at the fury radiating from his incensed human.

“Michael” he drawled, making the usual intense eye contact he used to convince Michael, maybe it was the ghost of his voice in Michael’s head way back when or maybe it was Michael’s new found appreciation for his smug charm, either way he used it to his advantage.

But Michael stayed fixed in his position, stood just outside of his house in that bloody stupid, ugly, adorable turtleneck, the newest fashion apparently and despite David’s best attempts the younger man had all but reverted to his Jock style fashion, all weightlifting and American football.

It was disgusting.

And somehow somewhat appealing, David still preferred the leather look though.

“No. Fuckin’. Way” he repeated firmly, crossing his arms across his chest.

David felt a smile tugging at his lips as he sensed Marko and Paul waking up, they were going to be so pissed he left them in the hotel alone, it wasn’t his fault Michael didn’t yet appreciate their group dynamics, more specifically their need to take the mick out of him at every chance possible.

In fact, the first thing out of Paul’s mouth when they’d come back to the hotel with intertwined hands was “Now I understand why he didn’t want to be one of us. He was already a fairy!”

Which of course earnt him a warning glare from Michael and a well concealed snort from David.

“How else are we supposed to get there Emerson?”

“Bite me jackass, I am not riding bitch!”

The blond shrugged, already tired of Michael’s complaints “I offered. You said no”

Michael took a few steps closer and shouldered the jacket David held out for him upon noticing the cold wind,

“Where are we even going anyway?”

Some days he still couldn’t believe it.

He was about to go on his 10th date with the same vampire that had tried to initiate him into his bloodsucking biker gang in a misguided attempt to woo him or some shit, it hadn’t been all Max, it was never for Max.

The boys lived for themselves, not for anyone else, not even their sire.

“Don’t know Mike, where’d you wanna go?”

“Hell”

“Gag me with a spoon sweetheart you’re already here”

Michael was subconsciously drawing closer to David and his bike as they traded semi-affectionate insults

“Lamo”

“Dweeb”

Michael huffed, offended, as if he’d ever be an ass kisser like the nerds at his school.

“Hoser”

David folded his arms across his chest like a middle schooler and retorted calmly, watching in amusement as Michael’s eye twitched in irritation.

“Grody” he quipped back, pleased with himself, if there was one thing Michael Emerson was, it was vain.

“Oh that’s it!” Michael growled.

All hell broke loose, Michael jumped at David, the frogs pulled up to the Emerson house on their Bicycles to see their best friends older brother wrestling with the scariest being in all of Santa Carla

“Take it back Jerkoff” Michael screeched, shoving his elbow into David’s middle, David cackled, safe in the knowledge that Michael could do nothing to really harm him.

“David! DON’T LAUGH AT ME”

Alan Frog shifted uncomfortably, unsure whether or not to continue with his brother to see Sam, they’d brought comics,or whether to break up the strange play fight that was happening smack bang in the middle of the Emerson house path.

Edgar made the choice for him, pulling the spare stake out of his backpack and aiming it at the squirming shape that was the Lost boy’s leader.

“Yield ye filthy shit-sucker!”

Michael stopped his relentless “attack” on his boyfriend to look up at the form of Edgar Frog, determination clear in his face holding out a stake and attempting to look menacing.

“Yield!” he repeated, still caught in his first tussle with the boys.

David tensed underneath him and Michael held his breath, David and the Frogs had never been able to tolerate each other, David blamed them for forcing Sam into the attempted slaughter of his brothers and the murder of Dwayne and they hated him because he was a vampire.

Chalk and cheese.

“Sam got an ABBA vinyl for his birthday, why don’t you go inside and listen to it with him?”

The frogs ignored Michael’s attempt to diffuse the situation and just stood shoulder to shoulder glaring at David, who shifted appropriately to rise to his full height, the dangerous predatory glint appearing in his eyes.

Then a grumble broke through the tension, all eyes turned to look at the geriatric pensioner bumbling up the path

“Even the gays are at each other’s throats these days, mhmpf what a world”

Grandpa Emerson shuffled past the teens smoothing down his eyebrows with his fingertips in preparation for his date with Widow Johnson.

Alan and Edgar exchanged nervous looks “Uh…we’re not- “

“Let’s book David” Michael interrupted stiffly, awkward at the thought of the frogs pining after his snot nosed little brother.

“Soon as you get on”

There was that smug look on his face again, the little smirk broke in favour of a fully-fledged grin that showcased his pointed fangs.

Michael’s blue eyes flicked between the twitchy frogs and David with his obscenely fast bike and his patronising tone, sighing he turned to poke a finger at the frogs,

“you didn’t see me do this. And if you narc on me David will give you wedgies bigger than your creepy obsession with my little brother” he threatened, sliding his sunglasses down to avoid being seen by anyone that knew him, oh if Star saw him now, not that he was sorry she'd gone, after the way she'd treated David before she left, screaming and clawing at him like a wild animal, blaming him for what she perceived as Michael being "manipulated".

David basked in the glory of his victory as Michael swung his leg over the bike, broodingly silently

“I’m not holding on to you like a teenage girl, so stop smirking like that”

David started the bike and a soon as they were a distance away from the frogs, he felt the brunet’s arms wrap around his middle and the tickle of soft curls at his nape.

“Dave?”

The vampire hummed in response swerving to take a sharp left which earned him a shriek from Michael.

“Where have you been for the last couple of weeks?”

as much as Michael accepted David’s reckless streak he had been a little worried, David always came, usually just to wind him up or scare Sam, but he came nonetheless, so when he’d missed Thursday date night and hadn’t showed up to take him to the hotel to hang with the others Friday, he knew something was up.

“I’ll show you later, we’re meeting the boys after this”

“After what?”

“Hello, Mcfly? Welcome to home for the next couple hours”

Michael’s face crinkled in distaste, the Santa Carla community theatre stood on the makeshift stage erected on the beach, trust David to be painfully cliché.

The memories of the hunt came back to him in little flashes, the boys laughing, the pain he felt forcing himself to stay away from the blood that was calling him, the feeling of being a family, being close to the pack, being whole.

David fidgeted, disliking Michael’s silence, maybe it was too soon.

They’d discussed the events, Michael was sorry Dwayne died, David and the boys, well they didn’t regret anything, apart from their failure in turning Michael.

“Gee Mike if you don’t like it- “

David let out a soft oof as he was crushed in a hug, if he was human Michael’s grip would have been too tight but he found it comfortable enough, maybe warmer than he was used to but that was the blood racing around Mike’s body.

“it’ll do. Yeah. It’ll do” Michael grumbled, pulling away and ducking his head to hide his content smile from David, he didn’t need any more of an ego boost.

They sank down onto David’s coat, which was big enough for about four,Michael felt a little more appreciative than usual and settled himself against David’s shoulder.

“What we watching Mullet-man?”

“Dracula”

“Heavy”

David tightened his arm around Michael, squeezing his shoulder lightly, something about the heat the human provided was satisfying, or maybe it was just his blatant weakness for him, the boys had stopped teasing as badly as they did at the beginning but they still loved to make crude innuendos when they thought David was out of range.

He tilted his head down to look at Michael who looked as neutral as ever.

“Too heavy? “he asked, forcing indifference.

“Never thought I’d see the day. David. Dickweed blood sucker, serial killer of Santa Carla, bitchin’ biker, gives a shit about me”

“You are my boyfriend Michael.”

The laughter rising in Michael’s throat died when he saw how serious David was, it was unnerving how serene he looked, young, like he had when he had those antlers through his chest, he'd always had that James Dean moody look about him, personally Michael had always found his hair kind of whacky but it was his face, just his face, he was nothing extraordinary about him to ordinary standards,in fact some plucky locals had even rated Paul the best looking, but David always got Michael. it was his angelic features, the youth in his eyes, the roundness of cheeks when he sneered, the brown stubble littering his jaw, making him look like an angel on the run. The polaroid's that Michael's mind had captured over the months cemented this new romanticised angel David, the most prominent was the day they went for a midnight walk with Thorne, who they boys had adopted after Max's death. David had handed Michael the lead so he could scope ahead to check for any threats, Michael, in his haste to keep up with David in the pitch black, had tripped over a rock and landed face first in the dirt. That was it, David laughing at him, then helping him up, hitting him roguishly with a flashlight, he could live in the dark eventually, because David was the sun, scolding and intense, scary. a real force of nature. 

“Yeah I fuckin’ am, don’t know how that happened there”

David’s face lit up in sadistic joy and he flicked Michael’s sunglasses off his face playfully never turning down a chance to exacerbate Michael's short fuse.

“Well, it started with those stupid glasses, who some equally stupid boy left behind at my hotel when he came snooping, although I’m not so sure it was accidental, hmm what do you think?”

“Shut up! You- “Michael was cut off by a pitchy uneven voice breaking through the air.

“if it isn’t Mr and Mr Jones”

David shook his head in exasperation, stood over them were the remaining lost boys, Marko and Paul

“Piss off boys, you smell like shit”

“and you- “Marko began as Paul chuckled hiding it behind a cough.

“you, smell like fresh meat”

The blonds burst out in maniacal laughter, clutching their sides

Michael grit his teeth, he could and would take the weird little runt any day.

“Charming. Mike, the play’s almost done, do you mind if we move on?”

Michael assessed the three vampires, his annoying smug, all together irritatingly perfect boyfriend, looking murderous, Marko clapping his hands together in amusement like a possessed monkey and Paul, trying, and failing to hold in his laughter.

“Didn’t know the circus was in town”  
Michael uttered, ignoring the anger that rose in him when David rubbed his arm like he was an unsettled child, bickering with David would just encourage them.

They’d had their fair amount of group scuffles too, usually the boys would be taunting Michael on an off day, David would warn them, Michael would have a cow because he could stand up for himself then they’d all get into a fight, David gunning for Marko, Paul dodging and Michael attempting to kick at David like a man possessed.

“Yo Duuuude!” 

“Okay! Fine”  
David frowned, noting Michael’s terrible mood he removed his hand carefully, not wanting to irritate Michael when he was in a bad mood.  
Pulling his coat off the floor he threw it over Michael’s head, it was so heavy that Michael struggled to removed it.

“DAVIIIIID! PAUL! MARKO GET IT OFF” he screeched stumbling around blindly.

David held a finger to his lips in signal to the boys and they jumped up into the tree just above them, their feet clinging around the branch to hold their weight.  
“DAVE COME ON!”  
Marko’s giggles began to trickle out but Paul quickly shot a hand out to stop them.  
“Michael Stay still, I’ll help you” 

David smiled secretly as he leant down and seized Michael’s ankles, pulling him upside down.  
The jacket floated to the floor and only Michael’s face was visible, his hair hanging around him like a halo.

“Asshole” he hissed before breaking his annoyed façade and dissolving into infectious laughter.

“You never have to out race us” David said softly, he consistently had a soft voice no matter how biting his words were.

“Just keep up” Michael finished, chest aching from the humorous battering it had taken.  
He was swiftly dropped onto the ground and pulled to his feet by Paul who had a funny look on his face, like someone who was caught between ripping the head off a stray cat or adopting said cat.

“Let’s go!” Marko squealed enthusiastically, fist bumping the air,  
but Paul looked between his leader and the human, taking Marko’s elbow “Nah c’mon man, we’ll take the skies” he prompted.  
“But Paulie-”  
“Jet Marko. Jet”  
“Hmpf fine”  
Marko stuck out his tongue at Paul before taking off, quick to avoid Paul’s wrath.

The dirty blond gave Michael a measured look  
“You’re a rad stud Miko. Rad Stud” he stated making a funny O shape with his fingers.

David snorted and revved his bike engine, keen to ignore the weird antics of his brother.  
Paul lingered a little like a bad smell but eventually followed after Marko, upon realising the high chances of him hunting solo.  
Marko was a notoriously messy eater after all.

“You guys are ten shades of weird”  
David poked at his fangs with this tongue in mild amusement, deep blue eyes shining with thinly veiled affection.

“We’re vampires. How normal do you want?”

“Maybe a vampire boyfriend who sparkles? Or writes poetry, or doesn’t have a family of pointlessly vexin' brothers?”

“No vampire sparkles Mike, but…we all bite” David snapped his jaw like a predator and Michael groaned.  
Big bad vampire sure, but big weird dork first.

“Ugh, you’re such a creep”  
David patted the space behind him.  
He’d never get tired of it, the bickering, the wrestling, the taunting and most importantly.  
Michael riding bitch.

“I’m not your bitch you know?”

“Sure you’re not babe”

“Don’t call me that!”

Yes, he could definitely get used to going back and forth with Michael Emerson.

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer-  
> I do not own any of these characters ;)
> 
> Gag me with a spoon- an expression of disgust  
> Bitchin'- something great  
> Don't have a cow- don't be worried  
> Grody- disgusting  
> Hello McFly?- used to get the attention of someone who is spaced out  
> Unbeta'd so if you find any mistakes lemme know  
> Hope you enjoyed my little plot bunny
> 
> Narc- a tattletale


End file.
